I have so very many feelings about diet culture generally, and really struggle to articulate most of them. Next time I need to I will be pointing people to this article.
Oh Anita….this does stir up a lot. Having been born in ‘68, from the Valleys and with a chocoholic mother who wasted years at Weight Watchers. Still struggling, on Weygovy, but happy to be three stone down. Yet still dreading an imminent short break in Portugal with two old friends who still look great in bikinis. It never bloody ends! Also, I drove past a group of school girls with very short skirts yesterday. They all looked cute except the fat girl, she looked ridiculous and I hated myself for thinking that….
It's so hard isn't it! I really envy the way younger girls have more freedom to wear what they like in a way older generations didn't! I don't think short skirts even came in plus sizes when I was growing up!
Born in 1965, I should have been strongly influenced by many of these fads, diets and beliefs. However, I was fortunate enough to have a Mum that ignored all of the above. I don’t know why or how she did it and sadly, I can’t ask her as she’s no longer with us. I grew up seeing my Mum eat normally, cook daily and never comment negatively about my or anyone else’s body.
I consider myself truly fortunate to have missed the worst of diet culture. That doesn’t mean I didn’t inflict some of it on myself over the years but somehow it didn’t get deep inside.
Ooof. The Cambridge diet. That scarred me for life as a young child (gen x here!) when my mom did it. I have vivid memories of her saying she couldn’t eat anything but had to drink her meals instead - “fasting” as she said back then. It definitely taught me allllll the wrong things about eating when I was at an impressionable age. It’s little wonder I developed anorexia as a teen (all good now though!).
I did HCG for a short time which is 500. Now I realize that it doesn’t matter what nonsense those companies say, ANYONE will lose weight at those calorie limits!! Someone could eat 3 twinkies a day and lose weight. It has zero to do with the HCG or whatever “magic” is in Cambridge.
Thank you. I recently wrote a post about aging, keying off a photo a longtime friend sent of me in a cheerleading outfit in the 1970s. I didn't recognize myself because I didn't recognize my thighs, which I called "thunder thighs" back then to ward off hurt from unkind remarks (and they were there, believe me). They didn't look terribly thundery to me, leading me to realize that my outlook on all of this has changed considerably since then. Maybe it's the three Gen Z kids I raised, each with their own body type that they are not ashamed of.
Wonderful resonant post, Anita. As the Gen X daughter of a boomer, I grew up attributing moral values to different foods and was put on a diet at 11. In my 50s, I can’t bring myself to expose my arms and so spend heatwaves sweating in long sleeves. And after two years of serious illness, there is a dark part of me that believes the weight loss makes it all worthwhile.
Thank you! All good now. But amazing how many people said wow you look fantastic you’ve lost so much weight when I’d just come out of two weeks in hospital.
Excellent article Anita! It's conjured up so many emotions within me. I'm Gen X to a Boomer mum. She was always bigger and was terrified I would end up like her. She hated her body and, despite the fact that she's now 76 and maybe only a couple of stones overweight, she still hates her body and is still obssessed with losing weight.
I danced ballet from the age of 3, and would dance every moment I could from morning until bed time. I was slim yet I have memories of being put on the Cambridge Diet at 8. I remember the bars because I would steal them to eat. I was a secret eater from a very young age and would binge constantly, taking money from mum's 50p box to go to the shops to buy junk. I stayed slim because of all the dancing, but all day, every day I obssessed about food.
The weight piled on at about 14 and I just got bigger and bigger until I hit 19 stone and plateaued. Throughout this, I was constantly told I was wrong, my body was wrong etc. Ironically, the fear mum had came true until I became even bigger, topping off at 26 stone.
I was lucky in that I was a bit bolshy and thought f**k society. I saw that even slim women hated their bodies and took the decision to not hate my body.
I ended up with type 2 diabetes, and when my blood sugars went haywire, I was put on Ozempic in addition to Metformin. I lost about 6 stone as a side effect of being on it, but the most amazing thing that happened was that all of the obssessive noise about food in my brain stopped. I no longer binge either.
I've been on pretty much every diet on the planet, always cheating and failing, weight coming off and going back on again. At no point in my life did anyone consider that I had a binge eating disorder, that I was probably dopamine seeking due to undiagnosed ADHD.
I'm actually pretty proud of myself for surviving what can only really be described as abuse and having a good relationship with my body.
I don't blame mum because her worldview was somehow warped, and she was only ever trying to protect me from becoming fat like her, which she hated. She didn't want me to go through the pain of not being accepted by society. She failed, of course, but I had the strength of mind to never see myself as anything less than anyone else.
Phew...sorry for the long post. That was cathartic!
Glad it helped to get it out on a page (screen!) The ADHD realisation was a huge one for me - I also felt all my binge-tendencies go when I started on ADHD meds too. I felt s uncontrollable around food and it's been a revelation realising why (with a later in life diagnosis.)
As a millennial who has been between a size 10 and 20 and now somewhere in the middle this article resonated. I'm a fitness instructor and know looking different is motivational to those I teach, however I still desire to lose fat for health and longevity. However there will always be a small part of me for which it is asthetical. I want to feel my best in the clothes I wear however I'm not willing to sacrifice my muscle to do this!
Thank you for sharing this! I also think there's something to be said for the generations about the availability of food and what kind of food was the norm at the time. My (boomer age) mum grew up with very frugal and old-fashioned parents who would eat very little and then anything that was served was expected to be eaten entirely, I think this was a layover from war time. Then raising us I think she tried to break that cycle a bit but still some of that ethos was there. So giving her some grace is important to me and I know she wasn't coming from a bad place when she would make comments, just that those thoughts were what she was exposed to growing up by her family and the culture at the time. I suffer with food noise and have been using Mounjaro for a year and explaining to her my experience and things I remember from growing up has helped her to understand that people aren't always just fat because they eat too much. She has done a great job understanding, and was my first subscriber to my substack about glp-1 experiences 🥰
I have so very many feelings about diet culture generally, and really struggle to articulate most of them. Next time I need to I will be pointing people to this article.
Thank you for finding the words.
So glad you liked it. SO much more to say on this now with Ozempic etc too! x
Oh Anita….this does stir up a lot. Having been born in ‘68, from the Valleys and with a chocoholic mother who wasted years at Weight Watchers. Still struggling, on Weygovy, but happy to be three stone down. Yet still dreading an imminent short break in Portugal with two old friends who still look great in bikinis. It never bloody ends! Also, I drove past a group of school girls with very short skirts yesterday. They all looked cute except the fat girl, she looked ridiculous and I hated myself for thinking that….
It's so hard isn't it! I really envy the way younger girls have more freedom to wear what they like in a way older generations didn't! I don't think short skirts even came in plus sizes when I was growing up!
Born in 1965, I should have been strongly influenced by many of these fads, diets and beliefs. However, I was fortunate enough to have a Mum that ignored all of the above. I don’t know why or how she did it and sadly, I can’t ask her as she’s no longer with us. I grew up seeing my Mum eat normally, cook daily and never comment negatively about my or anyone else’s body.
I consider myself truly fortunate to have missed the worst of diet culture. That doesn’t mean I didn’t inflict some of it on myself over the years but somehow it didn’t get deep inside.
That's really great you managed to get away with it- so few were spared!
Ooof. The Cambridge diet. That scarred me for life as a young child (gen x here!) when my mom did it. I have vivid memories of her saying she couldn’t eat anything but had to drink her meals instead - “fasting” as she said back then. It definitely taught me allllll the wrong things about eating when I was at an impressionable age. It’s little wonder I developed anorexia as a teen (all good now though!).
I swear that's what screwed up my metabolism - was on it for years! I think it was 400ish calories which is wild.
I wouldn’t be surprised.
I did HCG for a short time which is 500. Now I realize that it doesn’t matter what nonsense those companies say, ANYONE will lose weight at those calorie limits!! Someone could eat 3 twinkies a day and lose weight. It has zero to do with the HCG or whatever “magic” is in Cambridge.
Thank you. I recently wrote a post about aging, keying off a photo a longtime friend sent of me in a cheerleading outfit in the 1970s. I didn't recognize myself because I didn't recognize my thighs, which I called "thunder thighs" back then to ward off hurt from unkind remarks (and they were there, believe me). They didn't look terribly thundery to me, leading me to realize that my outlook on all of this has changed considerably since then. Maybe it's the three Gen Z kids I raised, each with their own body type that they are not ashamed of.
Sounds like you've done an amazing job to me - and helped break the cycle, you should be really proud!
I love this article! The shift away from body positivity and the gleeful embrace of fat shaming is distressing to me.
It's scary isn't it? I hate the way it seeps into your mind too, without you realising it!
Wonderful resonant post, Anita. As the Gen X daughter of a boomer, I grew up attributing moral values to different foods and was put on a diet at 11. In my 50s, I can’t bring myself to expose my arms and so spend heatwaves sweating in long sleeves. And after two years of serious illness, there is a dark part of me that believes the weight loss makes it all worthwhile.
I think so many people feel like this - it's so tricky as it's so deeply engrained in us! But i'm sorry to hear you've been sick :(
Thank you! All good now. But amazing how many people said wow you look fantastic you’ve lost so much weight when I’d just come out of two weeks in hospital.
Excellent article Anita! It's conjured up so many emotions within me. I'm Gen X to a Boomer mum. She was always bigger and was terrified I would end up like her. She hated her body and, despite the fact that she's now 76 and maybe only a couple of stones overweight, she still hates her body and is still obssessed with losing weight.
I danced ballet from the age of 3, and would dance every moment I could from morning until bed time. I was slim yet I have memories of being put on the Cambridge Diet at 8. I remember the bars because I would steal them to eat. I was a secret eater from a very young age and would binge constantly, taking money from mum's 50p box to go to the shops to buy junk. I stayed slim because of all the dancing, but all day, every day I obssessed about food.
The weight piled on at about 14 and I just got bigger and bigger until I hit 19 stone and plateaued. Throughout this, I was constantly told I was wrong, my body was wrong etc. Ironically, the fear mum had came true until I became even bigger, topping off at 26 stone.
I was lucky in that I was a bit bolshy and thought f**k society. I saw that even slim women hated their bodies and took the decision to not hate my body.
I ended up with type 2 diabetes, and when my blood sugars went haywire, I was put on Ozempic in addition to Metformin. I lost about 6 stone as a side effect of being on it, but the most amazing thing that happened was that all of the obssessive noise about food in my brain stopped. I no longer binge either.
I've been on pretty much every diet on the planet, always cheating and failing, weight coming off and going back on again. At no point in my life did anyone consider that I had a binge eating disorder, that I was probably dopamine seeking due to undiagnosed ADHD.
I'm actually pretty proud of myself for surviving what can only really be described as abuse and having a good relationship with my body.
I don't blame mum because her worldview was somehow warped, and she was only ever trying to protect me from becoming fat like her, which she hated. She didn't want me to go through the pain of not being accepted by society. She failed, of course, but I had the strength of mind to never see myself as anything less than anyone else.
Phew...sorry for the long post. That was cathartic!
Glad it helped to get it out on a page (screen!) The ADHD realisation was a huge one for me - I also felt all my binge-tendencies go when I started on ADHD meds too. I felt s uncontrollable around food and it's been a revelation realising why (with a later in life diagnosis.)
As a millennial who has been between a size 10 and 20 and now somewhere in the middle this article resonated. I'm a fitness instructor and know looking different is motivational to those I teach, however I still desire to lose fat for health and longevity. However there will always be a small part of me for which it is asthetical. I want to feel my best in the clothes I wear however I'm not willing to sacrifice my muscle to do this!
Thank you for sharing this! I also think there's something to be said for the generations about the availability of food and what kind of food was the norm at the time. My (boomer age) mum grew up with very frugal and old-fashioned parents who would eat very little and then anything that was served was expected to be eaten entirely, I think this was a layover from war time. Then raising us I think she tried to break that cycle a bit but still some of that ethos was there. So giving her some grace is important to me and I know she wasn't coming from a bad place when she would make comments, just that those thoughts were what she was exposed to growing up by her family and the culture at the time. I suffer with food noise and have been using Mounjaro for a year and explaining to her my experience and things I remember from growing up has helped her to understand that people aren't always just fat because they eat too much. She has done a great job understanding, and was my first subscriber to my substack about glp-1 experiences 🥰