This is an amazing piece Anita. So much is stacked against darker skin tones - and also if you do get through the algorithm as a south Asian woman (I found) you also can be pigeonholed by your ethnicity - being good at cooking, submissive etc. Really othering.
Thank you for writing this. It’s wildly creepy that they say their goal is to match people who look alike. (I’m not trying to date my brother?!) Tech bros aren’t even trying to hide their racism now.
I never thought about it, but I definitely saw mostly people with hair as dark as mine and skin as light as mine when using dating apps--Queer ones! I've never wanted to date someone who looked like me.
This is a *brilliant* piece. I don't think I've seen anyone dive into this subject from this angle, and it just exposes again how gross and racist tech is in the 21st century.
I haven't opened the apps in a while but oddly I had a different experience with them.
I've only been on dates with people of different races (I am very pale with dark hair). I don't think I filled in a preference for race so maybe that confuses the algorithm ?...
Algorithms are sad. Being conventionally attractive is something I've reflected on a lot (hello, aesthetic philosophy graduate here) and, with the disenchantment of an alternative kid, I'd say: so be it. If someone really crossed out entire races, would I want to see them in my options? Not really.
This is brilliant. This is also the case for Instagram algorithm. Creators that are blonde/white likely to get a lot more air time than people of colour. I would say it’s a partly a reflection on what our society is like but you do expect “an app” to give you a fair shot.
Wow, this was very interesting and disturbing/depressing at the same time. I guess I knew that the algorithms humans produce reflect and reinforce human biases, but this story really brought it home. I dated and was married before online dating (let alone apps) even existed, but it troubles me to think that if I had had to rely on an app I might not have even met my wife just because we're different races.
"Great read! The concept of being 'hot enough' for a dating app sparks an interesting debate about modern dating culture. While many apps still prioritize appearance through swiping mechanics, the real question is whether attractiveness should be the main factor in finding a meaningful connection. Fortunately, the dating app industry is evolving, with AI-driven matchmaking and interest-based compatibility playing a bigger role.
For those interested in dating app development, companies like Dev Technosys offer innovative solutions to create more inclusive and engaging platforms. Whether it's AI-powered recommendations, video profiles, or real-time chat features, the future of dating apps is all about improving user experience beyond just looks. Excited to see how the industry continues to evolve!"
I live in Delhi, India. When I was younger, I was told by a male friend that I was the only Panjabi girl who was not fair. By fair, he meant a peaches and cream complexion. A girlfriend told me once that the guy I had a crush on would prefer 'dark' girls like me, as his ex was 'dark'. These were people in their early 20s who belonged to rich and seemingly 'progressive' families. Even within South Asia, colourism runs deep.
This is an amazing piece Anita. So much is stacked against darker skin tones - and also if you do get through the algorithm as a south Asian woman (I found) you also can be pigeonholed by your ethnicity - being good at cooking, submissive etc. Really othering.
Thank you for writing this. It’s wildly creepy that they say their goal is to match people who look alike. (I’m not trying to date my brother?!) Tech bros aren’t even trying to hide their racism now.
I never thought about it, but I definitely saw mostly people with hair as dark as mine and skin as light as mine when using dating apps--Queer ones! I've never wanted to date someone who looked like me.
This is a *brilliant* piece. I don't think I've seen anyone dive into this subject from this angle, and it just exposes again how gross and racist tech is in the 21st century.
Wow! I honestly had no idea that the online dating apps were so skewed!
I haven't opened the apps in a while but oddly I had a different experience with them.
I've only been on dates with people of different races (I am very pale with dark hair). I don't think I filled in a preference for race so maybe that confuses the algorithm ?...
Algorithms are sad. Being conventionally attractive is something I've reflected on a lot (hello, aesthetic philosophy graduate here) and, with the disenchantment of an alternative kid, I'd say: so be it. If someone really crossed out entire races, would I want to see them in my options? Not really.
This is brilliant. This is also the case for Instagram algorithm. Creators that are blonde/white likely to get a lot more air time than people of colour. I would say it’s a partly a reflection on what our society is like but you do expect “an app” to give you a fair shot.
This is such a good piece Anita and so important to expose these biases in the apps.
I’m done with dating apps.
This was a brilliant read. I feel a bit physically sick now I’ve digested just how inhumane this all feels…
Wow, this was very interesting and disturbing/depressing at the same time. I guess I knew that the algorithms humans produce reflect and reinforce human biases, but this story really brought it home. I dated and was married before online dating (let alone apps) even existed, but it troubles me to think that if I had had to rely on an app I might not have even met my wife just because we're different races.
"Great read! The concept of being 'hot enough' for a dating app sparks an interesting debate about modern dating culture. While many apps still prioritize appearance through swiping mechanics, the real question is whether attractiveness should be the main factor in finding a meaningful connection. Fortunately, the dating app industry is evolving, with AI-driven matchmaking and interest-based compatibility playing a bigger role.
For those interested in dating app development, companies like Dev Technosys offer innovative solutions to create more inclusive and engaging platforms. Whether it's AI-powered recommendations, video profiles, or real-time chat features, the future of dating apps is all about improving user experience beyond just looks. Excited to see how the industry continues to evolve!"
I live in Delhi, India. When I was younger, I was told by a male friend that I was the only Panjabi girl who was not fair. By fair, he meant a peaches and cream complexion. A girlfriend told me once that the guy I had a crush on would prefer 'dark' girls like me, as his ex was 'dark'. These were people in their early 20s who belonged to rich and seemingly 'progressive' families. Even within South Asia, colourism runs deep.