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El's avatar

Thank you for saying this! Spoon theory fits my long covid life, a shower is often about as much self care as I can manage.

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

Oh i'm sorry about LC - it sounds horrific. Has anything helped? xx

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El's avatar

Not yet, but I live in hope!

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Zenoushka's avatar

ALL of this Anita - thank you so much for writing what has been on my mind x

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

I'm glad it resonates, have you managed to find your own version of self care? xx

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Sheila Anderson's avatar

I so relate to all of this. Self care involves listening to my own inner voice and being patient with the chaos, simple self love and acceptance. The outside dictums and judgments be damned.

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

You're so right. I'm so disconnected to my intuition, definitely something that comes with self care, and slowing down!

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Brina Patel's avatar

OMG thank you for writing this!! I could relate to so much of what you said on a deep level. Spoon theory has been a game-changer for me, too, as I live with chronic illness/pain. There aren't enough inclusive and realistic conversations around what self-care means, so I appreciate you immensely for sharing these perspectives.

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

Oh sorry to hear about the chronic pain :( How do you use the spoon theory? Do you have a reminder up anywhere? I always seem to forget it - maybe I need to make it my phone screensaver!

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Brina Patel's avatar

Thank you <3 I'd say the biggest way I've applied it is through pacing my days/weeks. So having downtime/stress relief methods weaved in between busier days, and just planning less overall bc the overwhelm of having too much going on affects things physically. Definitely have my slip-ups and am still learning but I'm gradually feeling less guilty about needing to go at a slower pace. Using it as a screensaver sounds like a great idea!

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Liezl Hoving's avatar

Revenge procrastination reading this. Totally worth it. Thank you 😬

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

Ah I'm glad! If we're going to procrastinate, then at least make it worth it right? (As opposed to me procrastinating by watching weird documentaries on youtube!!)

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Liezl Hoving's avatar

There are days. And then there are days. Haha

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Zoe Shaw's avatar

Super interesting! I also feel like working in the beauty industry everyone assumes I’m a pro at self care. Just because I have a skincare routine does not make me a devout practitioner of self care!

Brushing teeth is a funny one. Fellow ADHDer here and I can’t get through it without doing something else 🙈

I also found when I was in the initial stages of deep grief some people advised me to be kind to myself and practice self care. I know it was all well meaning but it pissed me off so much!

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Geetika's avatar

Isn't it ironic how there are way too many people telling us what to do, then making us feel bad when we don’t or can’t follow those instructions? What might be self-care for you probably won’t work for me, yet we’re bombarded daily with ideas drawn with very wide brush strokes. I have many insecurities, but fitting in and blindly following advice was never my thing. I’ll take suggestions and see if they make sense to me and my life. But you’re absolutely right – self-care is the new term being thrown about, and people are stressing about not being able to do all the self-care being prescribed. 🤪

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

I totally hear you on this - it's definitely worth thinking about what self care works for us individually! Has anything made a big difference to you? x

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Geetika's avatar

I recently, six months ago started studying Ayurveda and have been following simple principles that have been working well for me. Not sure if others would call them self care but I do. I am working on following a routine which I haven’t done most of my adult life. Sleeping and waking up at the same time, eating 3 meals and not snacking. Eating according to my dosha (body constitution) as much as possible.

It’s not easy to do in today’s crazed world with ridiculous schedules, but I see a difference in my mind and body.

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Anita Bhagwandas's avatar

Oh amazing! Weirdly I’ve been thinking about doing the same so this is very inspiring!

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