Embracing 'gloomth'...
If the festive season isn't feeling quite so joyous, maybe just embrace it...
Has anyone else had a sort of nothingy year? Nothing bad happened, nothing insanely exciting has either (aside from ace few work bits and some excellent holidays.) It was just in the middle of the road. A sort of 5/10 situation.
I’ve wondered if that was due to coming out of a year and a half of intense book promotion, back to freelance journalism and consulting and wondering ‘what now?’ As somebody who has always had a goal to strive towards, I definitely feel a bit untethered without one right now. Part of this comes from feeling a bit fed up with my industry (journalism rates have stayed the same for 15 years…). Seeing friends with new partners, babies and big homes also feels a little tricky to navigate, and personally feeling a little unsettled in my tiny flat and the UK too is not helping either.
Whilst I’m not actively sad, honestly I don’t feel entirely joyful either. So rather than forcing HAPPY at myself in the form of being out all the time, doing the traditional self care, and binging on overly jolly Christmas films, I’ve decided to lean into the feeling of ‘Gloomth’. I didn’t coin this word btw, it’s from the 1700s and was used by writer Horace Walpole to describe the juxtaposing dark warmth of his gothic home.
My understanding is that it’s a sort of melancholy tinged, comforting gothic warmth - the kind of feeling you get on dark wintry night and around Halloween (for me anyway…) or even watching or reading Harry Potter tbh. It’s the feeling that the dark academia interiors and style trends evoke, below…
If you want to know more about it, I highly recommend this free workshop below by the excellent Carterhaugh School on how to embrace it the darkness and that there can be some comfort in it. Think a candle lit bath, a dark atmospheric film and cocoa - whatever it takes to get you through it. I’ve popped some ideas below….
1.To soothe the soul…
I have a cosy TV routine every autumn. I start by rewatching Gossip Girl (the original, f*ck the new one,) and Gilmore Girls. By December I’m balls deep in watching Call the Midwife, a cult British show that documents the lives of a group of midwives in London’s east end from the 1950s, it’s heartwarming and old timey. I genuinely think it’s one of the best TV shows ever made and love the historical elements which are very well done. American frens you can watch it on PBS I believe. Whatever gives you that gloomth feeling, embrace it and bed in. Screw being festive…
2.To hunker down
Fun fact - I hate cold drinks. Even my water bottle contains hot and warm water. The best thing about the changing seasons is that I can drink a plethora of hot beverages sans judgement. Whatever you choose to drink (I love Anima Mundi’s Open Heart powder in almond milk or Fortnum Rose and Violet Tea because everything I drink seems to smell like a victorian perfume) you need the best vessel possible to contain it. Behold my favourite mugs from Outlandish Creations. Have a couple of chocolate cherries on the side too - these are my new obsession.
3.Substack reads to get lost in….
Gloomth and reading go hand in hand. Below are some of my fave recent substack reads that you might enjoy if you’re in a more pensive mood…
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- I loved ’s thoughts on criticism and the joys of ‘feedback’ here
- shares her thoughts on how to be present when nostalgia kicks in here
- Small talk is the opposite of gloomth, and navigates it here.
- shares a beautiful video on feeling alone. For anyone feeling the gloomth extra hard.
4.To embrace your inner spook
Gloomth needs a touch of the spooks, or macabre. I’m the WORST goth ever because I’m scared of horror films and anything jumpy, but I’ve become weirdly obsessed with poltergeists. After thorough inspection at 2am last night, it seems we loads in London (this city is fully haunted to be fair.) If you’re interested, then listen to the tale of the Battersea poltergeist here and watch this short docu on the Enfield poltergeist here.
PS: Poltergeist means noisy ghost in german - cute, right?
Speaking of things that we can’t see, where TF is Lord Lucan? I didn’t know much about this story as it was before my time, but for the similarly uninitiated, this English lord killed his children’s nanny in the 1970s, and then fled. Where is he now? Nobody quite knows - it’s a mystery! But the son of the nanny who was murdered has spent 17 years trying to find out what happened to his mother, and there's a great docu on the BBC about it. Very much worth a watch.
5. To perfume your gloom…
You might not be as gloomy as me, but either way, autumn is the time when having your home filled with beautiful scents is crucial. Honestly, the original Jo Malone Pomegranate Noir is my favourite candle of all time, and the dupe’s don’t compare at all. I’m also obsessed with Temple of Incense, who have some glorious incense sticks that hit the right note of gothic, contemplative and a teensy bit festive too.
Much love and gloomth….
FURTHER READING
-Upgrade your substack to paid here. Thank you! But if you can’t then do buy my book ‘UGLY: Why the word became beauty obsessed and how to break free’ instead. It’s available inthe UK here, in the US here and click here to for other countries.
-Follow me on Instagram here
-Find out more about my work here.
Omg I love these shows! Did you read the Call the Midwife book? I’m not a cryer and used to sob at Call the Midwife and the book!
“I have a cosy TV routine every autumn. I start by rewatching Gossip Girl (the original, f*ck the new one,) and Gilmore Girls. By December I’m balls deep in watching Call the Midwife, a cult British show that documents the lives of a group of midwives in London’s east end from the 1950s, it’s heartwarming and old timey.”
I am absolutely here for the Gloomth! 🖤🖤💀